1 00:00:07,040 --> 00:00:08,985 Okay, mr. Brotsky. 2 00:00:09,009 --> 00:00:10,253 Ed. 3 00:00:10,277 --> 00:00:13,857 Okay, ed. 4 00:00:13,881 --> 00:00:17,360 Want to tell me Exactely what happened? 5 00:00:17,384 --> 00:00:20,897 Well, I had just got done Taping my "Grand opening" banner 6 00:00:20,921 --> 00:00:22,098 Over the window, 7 00:00:22,122 --> 00:00:23,834 And I was starting to Blow up some balloons, 8 00:00:23,858 --> 00:00:26,469 When this guy walks into my shop 9 00:00:26,493 --> 00:00:28,204 And asks me if I'm Open for business yet. 10 00:00:28,228 --> 00:00:29,773 Right. 11 00:00:29,797 --> 00:00:31,508 Well, anyway, I said, "Yeah, 12 00:00:31,532 --> 00:00:34,077 In fact, you're my Very first customer." 13 00:00:34,101 --> 00:00:35,311 So he says "Great." 14 00:00:35,335 --> 00:00:37,481 And then, before I Even had a chance 15 00:00:37,505 --> 00:00:39,616 To offer him a Complimentary spoon, 16 00:00:39,640 --> 00:00:40,917 He takes out this gun, 17 00:00:40,941 --> 00:00:44,087 And he cleans out my Register and he takes my wallet. 18 00:00:44,111 --> 00:00:46,656 I see. 19 00:00:46,680 --> 00:00:48,758 Is there anything else? 20 00:00:48,782 --> 00:00:51,595 He called me a moron. 21 00:00:51,619 --> 00:00:54,630 Laughed right in my face, 22 00:00:54,654 --> 00:00:56,788 And he said my store was stupid. 23 00:01:00,794 --> 00:01:04,441 That would be ed's House of mugs, right? 24 00:01:04,465 --> 00:01:07,244 Personalized mugs. 25 00:01:07,268 --> 00:01:08,645 Mm-hmm. 26 00:01:08,669 --> 00:01:11,881 Say, uh, could I have One built for you? 27 00:01:14,975 --> 00:01:17,542 You know, I always Get you people. 28 00:01:24,151 --> 00:01:25,761 Hello, woj. 29 00:01:25,785 --> 00:01:27,052 Barn. 30 00:01:28,755 --> 00:01:31,301 Working on the Quarterly crime statistics? 31 00:01:31,325 --> 00:01:32,969 No, it's a magazine. 32 00:01:32,993 --> 00:01:34,537 Really? 33 00:01:34,561 --> 00:01:37,207 Yeah, they... 34 00:01:37,231 --> 00:01:40,510 They grabbed a guy Who is carving people up 35 00:01:40,534 --> 00:01:42,946 And then mailing Them in sections 36 00:01:42,970 --> 00:01:45,948 To rotary clubs all Around the country. 37 00:01:45,972 --> 00:01:48,752 Must have cost him A fortune in postage. 38 00:01:48,776 --> 00:01:51,354 Here's a picture of Some of his packages. 39 00:01:51,378 --> 00:01:52,755 Ugh. 40 00:01:52,779 --> 00:01:56,859 I don't know what's Going on with people, barn. 41 00:01:56,883 --> 00:01:59,329 I mean, I understand crime, 42 00:01:59,353 --> 00:02:01,597 But this kind of Disgusting thing... 43 00:02:01,621 --> 00:02:03,666 It's becoming as common as dirt. 44 00:02:03,690 --> 00:02:07,270 And then they're printing it In magazines just like this one 45 00:02:07,294 --> 00:02:09,605 So that some other Lunatic can read it 46 00:02:09,629 --> 00:02:11,574 And get some more new ideas. 47 00:02:11,598 --> 00:02:13,999 Then what the hell Are you reading it for? 48 00:02:15,702 --> 00:02:17,347 I don't know. 49 00:02:17,371 --> 00:02:19,182 It's interesting. 50 00:02:19,206 --> 00:02:23,018 Why don't you get to work On the crime statistics, huh? 51 00:02:23,042 --> 00:02:25,188 Yeah, sure. 52 00:02:25,212 --> 00:02:28,246 Oops, oops, oops, Oops, oops. Magazine. 53 00:02:30,317 --> 00:02:31,528 This is yours? 54 00:02:31,552 --> 00:02:33,130 Yeah, I left it in the w.C. 55 00:02:33,154 --> 00:02:36,399 I'm... I'm gonna write A book about this guy. 56 00:02:36,423 --> 00:02:39,035 Isn't that a particularly Gruesome subject? 57 00:02:39,059 --> 00:02:40,370 Well, I mean, it depends 58 00:02:40,394 --> 00:02:42,839 Upon how you handle The overall thesis. 59 00:02:42,863 --> 00:02:44,374 You know. 60 00:02:44,398 --> 00:02:48,044 Barn, unraveling A killer's mind, 61 00:02:48,068 --> 00:02:51,114 Taking a psychological Look at the society 62 00:02:51,138 --> 00:02:54,250 That breeds that kind of Hostility and malevolence, 63 00:02:54,274 --> 00:02:58,388 Played against the backdrop Of a city gripped in fear? 64 00:02:58,412 --> 00:03:01,291 I mean, barn, you know, Properly developed, 65 00:03:01,315 --> 00:03:06,563 The butchery becomes an Almost incidental garnish. 66 00:03:06,587 --> 00:03:08,264 You see my point? 67 00:03:08,288 --> 00:03:09,799 Oh, absolutely. 68 00:03:09,823 --> 00:03:10,933 Anyway, barn, 69 00:03:10,957 --> 00:03:14,070 Bates publishing bought The rights to the story, 70 00:03:14,094 --> 00:03:16,439 And my agent has already Sold them on the fact 71 00:03:16,463 --> 00:03:18,975 That I'm just the guy to Whip it into a paperback. 72 00:03:18,999 --> 00:03:20,309 Well, congratulations. 73 00:03:20,333 --> 00:03:24,113 Of course, um, the deal Hasn't been finalized yet. 74 00:03:24,137 --> 00:03:25,882 Oh. 75 00:03:25,906 --> 00:03:27,584 It'll probably happen today... 76 00:03:27,608 --> 00:03:30,241 Uh, over lunch. 77 00:03:36,249 --> 00:03:38,327 I take it you have a meeting. 78 00:03:38,351 --> 00:03:42,264 It's just the publisher's Winging in from newark, 79 00:03:42,288 --> 00:03:46,202 And I'm only gonna need An extra half-hour or so, 80 00:03:46,226 --> 00:03:48,226 If that's okay with you. 81 00:03:50,196 --> 00:03:51,808 A half-hour. 82 00:03:53,133 --> 00:03:54,533 Thanks, barney. 83 00:03:55,969 --> 00:03:57,581 Ira, please calm down! 84 00:03:57,605 --> 00:03:58,981 Yes, can I help you? 85 00:03:59,005 --> 00:04:01,318 Yes, yes, we need protection! 86 00:04:01,342 --> 00:04:02,552 Oh? 87 00:04:02,576 --> 00:04:04,821 There's a man out there Who wants to kill us! 88 00:04:04,845 --> 00:04:06,923 He's a maniac! He Wants to kill us both! 89 00:04:06,947 --> 00:04:08,513 Uh-huh. 90 00:04:11,017 --> 00:04:13,385 Have we come at a bad time? 91 00:05:22,589 --> 00:05:24,901 Mr. And mrs. Buckman, I'm captain miller. 92 00:05:24,925 --> 00:05:26,703 - a pleasure. - how do you do? 93 00:05:26,727 --> 00:05:27,804 - please, uh... - thank you. 94 00:05:27,828 --> 00:05:29,005 Sergeant dietrich tells me 95 00:05:29,029 --> 00:05:30,206 Someone's been threatening you. 96 00:05:30,230 --> 00:05:32,008 He called early this morning. 97 00:05:32,032 --> 00:05:33,542 He said he wouldn't rest 98 00:05:33,566 --> 00:05:36,413 Until he could snap my Neck with his bare hands 99 00:05:36,437 --> 00:05:38,470 And violate my wife! 100 00:05:40,273 --> 00:05:43,586 He sounded very sincere. 101 00:05:43,610 --> 00:05:46,556 I was listening On the extension. 102 00:05:46,580 --> 00:05:49,325 You sure this Wasn't just a crank? 103 00:05:49,349 --> 00:05:50,927 Oh, no. It's not a crank. 104 00:05:50,951 --> 00:05:53,162 Mr. Yeager made Some rude noises... 105 00:05:53,186 --> 00:05:54,296 - mr. Yeager? - oy. 106 00:05:54,320 --> 00:05:55,598 Miriam, please. 107 00:05:55,622 --> 00:05:57,934 He mentioned something About his lottery ticket. 108 00:05:57,958 --> 00:05:59,268 What lottery ticket? 109 00:05:59,292 --> 00:06:01,971 The one he bought in my Grocery store last week. 110 00:06:01,995 --> 00:06:04,974 He said it should Have won $10,000 111 00:06:04,998 --> 00:06:06,943 And that it's my Fault that it didn't, 112 00:06:06,967 --> 00:06:08,578 And then he went on to say... 113 00:06:08,602 --> 00:06:10,847 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Why would he say that? 114 00:06:10,871 --> 00:06:14,606 Oh, well, I don't... Ira! 115 00:06:20,981 --> 00:06:23,693 I forgot to send it in. 116 00:06:23,717 --> 00:06:25,183 Oh. 117 00:06:27,087 --> 00:06:29,766 I found it in the cash register 118 00:06:29,790 --> 00:06:32,702 Clipped onto a Pile of food stamps. 119 00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:36,906 You, uh, told mr. Yeager About this oversight? 120 00:06:36,930 --> 00:06:39,508 He doesn't want to Know from oversights! 121 00:06:39,532 --> 00:06:42,846 He... He watched the Drawings on tv on saturday, 122 00:06:42,870 --> 00:06:45,047 Saw his number come up, 123 00:06:45,071 --> 00:06:47,549 And now he says I'm dead meat. 124 00:06:47,573 --> 00:06:49,340 Well, I should say so. 125 00:06:51,111 --> 00:06:52,889 You and wojo pick up yeager. 126 00:06:52,913 --> 00:06:55,692 The address is on the ticket... 127 00:06:55,716 --> 00:06:57,559 Right under the winning number. 128 00:06:57,583 --> 00:06:59,796 That's it, miriam. 129 00:06:59,820 --> 00:07:02,264 Keep punching. 130 00:07:02,288 --> 00:07:05,067 All right, mr. Buckman, Want to have a seat? 131 00:07:05,091 --> 00:07:07,603 The two of you just relax. We'll see what we can do. 132 00:07:07,627 --> 00:07:08,927 You're very kind. 133 00:07:10,396 --> 00:07:13,843 The delicatessen wasn't Exciting enough for you? 134 00:07:13,867 --> 00:07:15,745 You had to open a casino? 135 00:07:15,769 --> 00:07:19,448 Every merchant on the Block sells lottery tickets. 136 00:07:19,472 --> 00:07:20,972 I'm a merchant. 137 00:07:23,543 --> 00:07:26,177 I'm ed... Ed's house of mugs. 138 00:07:28,048 --> 00:07:29,959 During my opening-day Ceremonies, 139 00:07:29,983 --> 00:07:32,394 While I was hanging My opening-day banner 140 00:07:32,418 --> 00:07:33,896 And blowing up some balloons, 141 00:07:33,920 --> 00:07:36,499 A man with a gun Came into my shop 142 00:07:36,523 --> 00:07:39,791 And robbed me of Practically everything I own. 143 00:07:45,698 --> 00:07:48,667 When he's like this, Nothing cheers him up. 144 00:07:52,839 --> 00:07:55,384 All right, gentlemen. Please, don't get up. 145 00:07:55,408 --> 00:07:59,344 Rank is a mockery, And seniority is a curse. 146 00:08:00,847 --> 00:08:02,714 Where the hell is everybody? 147 00:08:03,850 --> 00:08:05,527 They're away on business. 148 00:08:05,551 --> 00:08:06,796 Oh, inspector. 149 00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:07,897 Barney. 150 00:08:07,921 --> 00:08:09,631 What a surprise. 151 00:08:09,655 --> 00:08:10,867 I guess so. 152 00:08:10,891 --> 00:08:12,468 Where's all the troops? 153 00:08:12,492 --> 00:08:13,602 On maneuvers. 154 00:08:13,626 --> 00:08:17,273 That's a good one, barn. 155 00:08:17,297 --> 00:08:20,509 For a minute there, it Almost took my mind off this. 156 00:08:20,533 --> 00:08:22,145 - what's the matter? - hmm? 157 00:08:22,169 --> 00:08:24,246 Oh, no big deal, barney... 158 00:08:24,270 --> 00:08:26,716 Just official notification 159 00:08:26,740 --> 00:08:31,220 That as of 25 may Of our lord 1982, 160 00:08:31,244 --> 00:08:35,257 In accordance with the Official policies of the nypd, 161 00:08:35,281 --> 00:08:39,796 Inspector frank d. Luger will cease to exist. 162 00:08:39,820 --> 00:08:41,197 Retirement? 163 00:08:41,221 --> 00:08:43,132 Exactly, barn. 164 00:08:43,156 --> 00:08:45,267 My office, inspector? 165 00:08:45,291 --> 00:08:47,959 Heh. Well, as long As I'm still here, huh? 166 00:08:51,297 --> 00:08:54,243 So, as you can imagine, barney, 167 00:08:54,267 --> 00:08:58,214 I've been giving these last Lonely impending days of mine 168 00:08:58,238 --> 00:09:00,583 A good deal of thought. 169 00:09:00,607 --> 00:09:02,585 - I can imagine. - yep. 170 00:09:02,609 --> 00:09:05,187 Picturing myself, you know, 171 00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:06,956 Same time next year, 172 00:09:06,980 --> 00:09:09,392 Sitting on some Lousy park bench, 173 00:09:09,416 --> 00:09:13,295 Pigeons flying around, Pecking at my hat. 174 00:09:13,319 --> 00:09:15,297 Snotty little kids Running around... Ptoo... 175 00:09:15,321 --> 00:09:17,433 - spitting at me. - inspector... 176 00:09:17,457 --> 00:09:19,802 No, I-I wake up screaming, barn. 177 00:09:19,826 --> 00:09:21,070 - inspector, that's crazy. - huh? 178 00:09:21,094 --> 00:09:23,406 Come on, you're a Relatively young man. 179 00:09:23,430 --> 00:09:25,608 You're in good Physical condition, 180 00:09:25,632 --> 00:09:27,810 Financially independent. 181 00:09:27,834 --> 00:09:29,479 Most people facing retirement 182 00:09:29,503 --> 00:09:31,346 Would envy a man In your position. 183 00:09:31,370 --> 00:09:34,584 Ah, but, barney, most People facing retirement, 184 00:09:34,608 --> 00:09:37,887 They got, you know, somebody Else facing it with them. 185 00:09:37,911 --> 00:09:40,523 Yeah, me, I got nobody. 186 00:09:40,547 --> 00:09:42,592 I mean, after all, you know, 187 00:09:42,616 --> 00:09:45,194 Old forrester, Kleiner, brownie... 188 00:09:45,218 --> 00:09:49,632 Right now they're nothing But... But worm mush. 189 00:09:49,656 --> 00:09:51,266 And you. 190 00:09:51,290 --> 00:09:53,669 You'll be stuck in This lousy little office 191 00:09:53,693 --> 00:09:56,205 For another 20 years or so. 192 00:09:56,229 --> 00:10:01,833 Fish... Fish never Returns my phone calls. 193 00:10:04,103 --> 00:10:05,948 Well, I... 194 00:10:05,972 --> 00:10:09,018 I've been considering All the options, barney, 195 00:10:09,042 --> 00:10:13,523 And I figure that maybe right Now is as good a time as any 196 00:10:13,547 --> 00:10:17,459 For the old inspector To, you know, tie the knot. 197 00:10:17,483 --> 00:10:18,861 What? 198 00:10:18,885 --> 00:10:21,664 Get married. 199 00:10:21,688 --> 00:10:24,233 You're kidding! 200 00:10:24,257 --> 00:10:25,968 No! 201 00:10:25,992 --> 00:10:29,705 No, I mean, why should I spend These last few miserable years 202 00:10:29,729 --> 00:10:31,073 All by myself? 203 00:10:31,097 --> 00:10:33,665 I want to share Them with somebody. 204 00:10:36,269 --> 00:10:37,947 Who's the lucky lady? 205 00:10:37,971 --> 00:10:40,215 How the hell should I know? 206 00:10:40,239 --> 00:10:42,051 I haven't picked her out yet. 207 00:10:42,075 --> 00:10:43,619 Oh. 208 00:10:43,643 --> 00:10:45,154 Here. 209 00:10:45,178 --> 00:10:47,422 Take a gander at this, barney. 210 00:10:47,446 --> 00:10:50,114 lotus blossom quarterly? 211 00:10:53,419 --> 00:10:55,898 "Complete up-to-date Photo listings 212 00:10:55,922 --> 00:10:58,801 "Of eligible asian women 213 00:10:58,825 --> 00:11:02,572 Wishing to meet Eligible american men"? 214 00:11:02,596 --> 00:11:06,998 Yeah, I thought maybe we'd Start out with malaysia. 215 00:11:11,337 --> 00:11:13,382 Mail call. 216 00:11:13,406 --> 00:11:15,084 - sergeant harris. - yeah. 217 00:11:15,108 --> 00:11:17,286 Must be the Harmonica you ordered. 218 00:11:17,310 --> 00:11:18,310 Just kidding. 219 00:11:20,113 --> 00:11:21,323 Dietrich. 220 00:11:21,347 --> 00:11:22,525 Dietrich. 221 00:11:22,549 --> 00:11:23,915 Dietrich. 222 00:11:28,087 --> 00:11:29,187 Captain miller. 223 00:11:31,124 --> 00:11:33,169 Wojciehowicz. 224 00:11:33,193 --> 00:11:35,304 Wojciehowicz. 225 00:11:35,328 --> 00:11:36,728 Nothing for you folks. 226 00:11:39,165 --> 00:11:40,175 Yes, levitt? 227 00:11:40,199 --> 00:11:41,210 Sir, your mail. 228 00:11:41,234 --> 00:11:42,299 Oh, thank you. 229 00:11:44,438 --> 00:11:45,547 Anything else? 230 00:11:45,571 --> 00:11:47,950 If you don't mind My saying so, sir, 231 00:11:47,974 --> 00:11:49,974 You're looking Very preppy today. 232 00:11:52,311 --> 00:11:53,778 In what way? 233 00:11:55,982 --> 00:11:57,514 I'm not quite sure. 234 00:12:00,153 --> 00:12:01,897 We're back. 235 00:12:01,921 --> 00:12:03,833 What happened? 236 00:12:03,857 --> 00:12:06,569 We found yeager's Apartment, but he wasn't there. 237 00:12:06,593 --> 00:12:08,070 The place is a real dump. 238 00:12:08,094 --> 00:12:10,172 The guy must be Starving to death. 239 00:12:10,196 --> 00:12:12,575 Dietrich: I asked the super Where he was working. 240 00:12:12,599 --> 00:12:14,576 Said he hasn't had a Job for eight months. 241 00:12:15,602 --> 00:12:17,246 - ira. - miriam! 242 00:12:17,270 --> 00:12:19,582 So what happens now, captain? 243 00:12:19,606 --> 00:12:22,385 We'll get a physical Description from the two of you. 244 00:12:22,409 --> 00:12:23,519 We'll circulate it. 245 00:12:23,543 --> 00:12:25,488 In the meantime, I'll have the, uh... 246 00:12:25,512 --> 00:12:27,089 Barn? Call from dispatch. 247 00:12:27,113 --> 00:12:29,292 The alarm just went Off at a delicatessen 248 00:12:29,316 --> 00:12:30,559 On bleecker and 19th. 249 00:12:30,583 --> 00:12:32,094 - that's our store! - ira! 250 00:12:32,118 --> 00:12:33,496 Barney: just take it easy! 251 00:12:33,520 --> 00:12:35,498 Well, I guess that's lunch. 252 00:12:35,522 --> 00:12:37,099 Oh, right. 253 00:12:37,123 --> 00:12:39,535 Um, all right, wojo, dietrich. 254 00:12:39,559 --> 00:12:42,170 Hey, I found him! I found The guy who robbed me! 255 00:12:42,194 --> 00:12:43,406 Just excuse me a moment. 256 00:12:43,430 --> 00:12:45,508 Are you certain of That, mr. Brotsky? 257 00:12:45,532 --> 00:12:47,075 Yes, positive. 258 00:12:47,099 --> 00:12:49,144 - harris? - yes. 259 00:12:49,168 --> 00:12:52,347 We got a positive I.D. From mr. Brotsky. 260 00:12:52,371 --> 00:12:54,182 I want you to check it out. 261 00:12:54,206 --> 00:12:56,574 But, barney, I've got To go to a meeting. 262 00:12:59,079 --> 00:13:00,389 This is your case. 263 00:13:00,413 --> 00:13:03,025 Uh, sir, I'm Available. I can go. 264 00:13:03,049 --> 00:13:06,061 Or dietrich and I can split up. 265 00:13:06,085 --> 00:13:07,897 What is this? 266 00:13:07,921 --> 00:13:09,801 Get out of here! You got a call! 267 00:13:12,826 --> 00:13:15,404 You too. Take levitt. 268 00:13:15,428 --> 00:13:18,930 Barney, people from new Jersey are expecting me. 269 00:13:20,766 --> 00:13:22,144 Now, look, harris, 270 00:13:22,168 --> 00:13:25,214 For two years, I've put Up with cocktail parties, 271 00:13:25,238 --> 00:13:27,549 Autograph sessions, Late lunches, 272 00:13:27,573 --> 00:13:29,952 And it's not gonna happen again! 273 00:13:29,976 --> 00:13:31,120 Understood? 274 00:13:31,144 --> 00:13:33,856 Does this mean I can't go? 275 00:13:33,880 --> 00:13:35,824 - right. - fine. 276 00:13:35,848 --> 00:13:37,359 Levitt? 277 00:13:37,383 --> 00:13:39,617 Uh, levitt, come on. Let's go. 278 00:13:44,190 --> 00:13:45,623 Shhhh! 279 00:13:47,193 --> 00:13:49,226 I think it was him. 280 00:13:56,903 --> 00:13:59,714 Oh. Inspector. 281 00:13:59,738 --> 00:14:02,852 Uh... Sorry I took so long. 282 00:14:02,876 --> 00:14:05,520 I, uh... It was kind Of hectic out there. 283 00:14:05,544 --> 00:14:07,522 Oh, sure. That's okay, barney. 284 00:14:07,546 --> 00:14:09,091 I've just been sitting here 285 00:14:09,115 --> 00:14:11,260 Alone in your office, as usual. 286 00:14:11,284 --> 00:14:15,164 But I do think I've Narrowed this down 287 00:14:15,188 --> 00:14:17,132 A little bit, barney. 288 00:14:17,156 --> 00:14:21,070 Oh, inspector, that's Not gonna work. 289 00:14:21,094 --> 00:14:22,504 Why not? 290 00:14:25,031 --> 00:14:28,143 At best, marriage is A tough proposition. 291 00:14:28,167 --> 00:14:30,012 Oh, I know that, barney. 292 00:14:30,036 --> 00:14:33,949 And these ladies Are total strangers 293 00:14:33,973 --> 00:14:36,886 From an alien culture Halfway around the world. 294 00:14:36,910 --> 00:14:40,790 But nobody in this Country likes me, barney. 295 00:14:40,814 --> 00:14:43,792 That's not true. 296 00:14:43,816 --> 00:14:47,562 I mean, what about that cashier From bensonhurst... Grace? 297 00:14:47,586 --> 00:14:50,332 You two seemed to Hit it off pretty good. 298 00:14:50,356 --> 00:14:54,469 And, uh... You were Engaged to agnes. 299 00:14:54,493 --> 00:14:58,173 Agnes left me, barney. 300 00:14:58,197 --> 00:14:59,808 Oh. 301 00:14:59,832 --> 00:15:03,913 Says I wasn't physical Enough for her. 302 00:15:03,937 --> 00:15:06,437 Ran away with her hairdresser. 303 00:15:08,074 --> 00:15:09,985 Sorry. I-I didn't know that. 304 00:15:10,009 --> 00:15:12,054 Well, it's not exactly The kind of thing 305 00:15:12,078 --> 00:15:14,423 You brag about, barney. 306 00:15:14,447 --> 00:15:17,993 But you're probably right. Maybe this thing isn't for me. 307 00:15:18,017 --> 00:15:20,662 I ain't never been lucky With the ladies before. 308 00:15:20,686 --> 00:15:23,465 What makes me think I can Find the right one in here? 309 00:15:23,489 --> 00:15:24,700 Well... 310 00:15:24,724 --> 00:15:26,201 Uh, you decide, barney. 311 00:15:26,225 --> 00:15:27,402 Huh? 312 00:15:27,426 --> 00:15:29,704 Just narrow it down To three or four, huh? 313 00:15:29,728 --> 00:15:31,806 I'll check back With you in an hour. 314 00:15:31,830 --> 00:15:34,176 Inspector... Now, now! 315 00:15:34,200 --> 00:15:36,078 - look... - barney... 316 00:15:36,102 --> 00:15:37,947 All right, inside, mr. Yeager. 317 00:15:37,971 --> 00:15:39,949 Come on. You want To get in there? 318 00:15:39,973 --> 00:15:41,816 Yeah, I want to get in there. 319 00:15:41,840 --> 00:15:43,418 I also want to see him dead! 320 00:15:43,442 --> 00:15:46,488 I also want to see his body Dragged through the streets! 321 00:15:46,512 --> 00:15:47,644 Wojo: take it easy! 322 00:15:49,149 --> 00:15:51,493 I take it this is mr. Yeager. 323 00:15:51,517 --> 00:15:53,462 Why? Do I sound Like a sore loser? 324 00:15:53,486 --> 00:15:55,998 When we got to the deli, The back door was smashed in, 325 00:15:56,022 --> 00:15:58,334 And mr. Yeager was Loading up some boxes 326 00:15:58,358 --> 00:15:59,634 With imported cold cuts. 327 00:15:59,658 --> 00:16:01,403 The register was empty. 328 00:16:01,427 --> 00:16:03,038 I had to take something! 329 00:16:03,062 --> 00:16:06,041 We know you got a Raw deal, mr. Yeager, 330 00:16:06,065 --> 00:16:08,110 And I know the buckmans Feel very bad about it, 331 00:16:08,134 --> 00:16:09,844 - but that doesn't... - they feel bad? 332 00:16:09,868 --> 00:16:11,746 Who the hell cares? 333 00:16:11,770 --> 00:16:12,915 All right, mr. Yeager. 334 00:16:12,939 --> 00:16:14,716 You know, every week For the last five years, 335 00:16:14,740 --> 00:16:16,551 I've been buying one Ticket, two tickets... 336 00:16:16,575 --> 00:16:17,686 Whatever I could afford. 337 00:16:17,710 --> 00:16:19,488 And I'd always play The same numbers... 338 00:16:19,512 --> 00:16:22,691 The zip code of mom's Sanitarium in plattsburgh. 339 00:16:22,715 --> 00:16:24,626 Oh, god. 340 00:16:24,650 --> 00:16:27,462 You see, I always dreamed That one day I'd hit it big, 341 00:16:27,486 --> 00:16:30,032 And then I'd be able to get Her out of that snake pit 342 00:16:30,056 --> 00:16:31,567 And send her down to florida 343 00:16:31,591 --> 00:16:33,768 To one of those plush Retirement villages... 344 00:16:33,792 --> 00:16:38,440 You know, with bingo And shuffleboard and tv. 345 00:16:38,464 --> 00:16:42,411 Now I guess I'll Have to call her up, 346 00:16:42,435 --> 00:16:44,446 Tell her to unpack. 347 00:16:44,470 --> 00:16:47,216 Plattsburgh is The end of the line! 348 00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:48,617 Ira! 349 00:16:48,641 --> 00:16:52,687 If it's the last thing I do, I'll get you, ira! 350 00:16:52,711 --> 00:16:53,888 In the cage. 351 00:16:53,912 --> 00:16:55,657 I'll kill you, ira! 352 00:16:55,681 --> 00:16:56,658 Miriam! 353 00:16:56,682 --> 00:16:59,283 You too, miriam! 354 00:17:06,058 --> 00:17:07,870 Levitt: move it inside, shapper! 355 00:17:07,894 --> 00:17:09,138 Shapper: come on! 356 00:17:09,162 --> 00:17:13,141 You know I was doing the Chamber of commerce a big favor? 357 00:17:13,165 --> 00:17:14,577 Save it for the lunch, thief. 358 00:17:14,601 --> 00:17:17,145 This is anthony Shapper, captain. 359 00:17:17,169 --> 00:17:19,748 He robbed mr. Brotsky's store. 360 00:17:19,772 --> 00:17:20,949 I was right. 361 00:17:20,973 --> 00:17:23,085 Sir, we found him Sitting in his apartment, 362 00:17:23,109 --> 00:17:24,920 Cleaning this and watching tv. 363 00:17:24,944 --> 00:17:27,489 Yeah, you know, they Just busted right in. 364 00:17:27,513 --> 00:17:30,125 Yeah, right in the middle Of "Wall street week." 365 00:17:30,149 --> 00:17:33,662 Hey, that rukeyser, he kills me. 366 00:17:33,686 --> 00:17:36,398 I'll see to it that Gets into your report. 367 00:17:36,422 --> 00:17:37,499 Levitt. 368 00:17:37,523 --> 00:17:40,069 Oh, I'll take it, captain. 369 00:17:40,093 --> 00:17:42,071 Uh, my case. 370 00:17:42,095 --> 00:17:43,994 Hey, come on. Over here. 371 00:17:45,464 --> 00:17:46,475 Hey! 372 00:17:46,499 --> 00:17:48,110 He-e-y! Mugsie! 373 00:17:48,134 --> 00:17:49,511 Hey, how's business? 374 00:17:49,535 --> 00:17:51,914 Hey, sit down. 375 00:17:51,938 --> 00:17:55,450 Sir, about sergeant Harris' book. 376 00:17:55,474 --> 00:17:56,619 What about it? 377 00:17:56,643 --> 00:17:58,320 You know he missed lunch. 378 00:17:58,344 --> 00:17:59,744 Yes, I know! 379 00:18:01,714 --> 00:18:03,391 They went back to new jersey. 380 00:18:03,415 --> 00:18:04,960 Okay! 381 00:18:04,984 --> 00:18:07,251 They didn't know if They were coming back. 382 00:18:12,692 --> 00:18:14,391 How you doing, laverne? 383 00:18:17,864 --> 00:18:19,674 Levine? 384 00:18:19,698 --> 00:18:21,810 He's a nice little Fellow, barney. 385 00:18:21,834 --> 00:18:24,613 What do you got... A Fire sale going on here? 386 00:18:24,637 --> 00:18:26,148 It's the busy season. 387 00:18:26,172 --> 00:18:27,172 Ah. 388 00:18:30,442 --> 00:18:33,922 Oh, barney, I was on The horn downstairs. 389 00:18:33,946 --> 00:18:38,493 I called up my old redheaded Cashier from bensonhurst. 390 00:18:38,517 --> 00:18:39,627 Oh, yeah? 391 00:18:39,651 --> 00:18:40,829 Mm-hmm. 392 00:18:40,853 --> 00:18:42,397 She's dead. 393 00:18:42,421 --> 00:18:44,667 Oh. 394 00:18:44,691 --> 00:18:47,603 How about you, barn? Any luck? 395 00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:51,261 Did you pick me out an Alien I can sink my teeth into? 396 00:18:54,467 --> 00:18:57,446 Inspector, you can't Make a choice like this 397 00:18:57,470 --> 00:19:00,115 From a grainy Photograph in a magazine. 398 00:19:00,139 --> 00:19:02,584 That's how I got these shoes. 399 00:19:02,608 --> 00:19:04,954 You don't know anything 400 00:19:04,978 --> 00:19:07,522 About these women Or their culture... 401 00:19:07,546 --> 00:19:09,691 How they think, what they feel. 402 00:19:09,715 --> 00:19:12,127 Yeah, but you, barney... You've been fooling around 403 00:19:12,151 --> 00:19:14,463 With this human-nature Junk for years, huh? 404 00:19:14,487 --> 00:19:17,566 Sticking your nose up Into people's character? 405 00:19:17,590 --> 00:19:20,269 You got an instinct, barney. 406 00:19:20,293 --> 00:19:22,404 Thank you. 407 00:19:22,428 --> 00:19:24,028 My pleasure. 408 00:19:31,003 --> 00:19:33,014 Look, if you're really serious 409 00:19:33,038 --> 00:19:35,517 About going this route... 410 00:19:35,541 --> 00:19:37,987 Well, letters Have to be written, 411 00:19:38,011 --> 00:19:39,855 Contacts have to be made. 412 00:19:39,879 --> 00:19:42,591 Well, do whatever You have to do, barney. 413 00:19:42,615 --> 00:19:44,059 Whoa, whoa! Whoa, wait a minute. 414 00:19:44,083 --> 00:19:46,228 Oh, no, no, no. Not me. I don't have the time. 415 00:19:46,252 --> 00:19:47,629 Oh. 416 00:19:47,653 --> 00:19:49,098 Well, okay, barney. 417 00:19:50,556 --> 00:19:53,969 I'll just give it the old "Eeny Meeny miny moe" treatment, 418 00:19:53,993 --> 00:19:56,871 Hope I don't wind up With some vietcong broad 419 00:19:56,895 --> 00:19:59,708 That's gonna slit my Throat on my honeymoon 420 00:19:59,732 --> 00:20:01,132 For my insurance. 421 00:20:03,068 --> 00:20:05,436 I'll write the letters. 422 00:20:10,743 --> 00:20:12,521 If you really want to. 423 00:20:12,545 --> 00:20:14,111 I want to. I want to. 424 00:20:16,649 --> 00:20:18,694 Uh, let's see... 425 00:20:18,718 --> 00:20:20,462 I really appreciate it, barn. 426 00:20:20,486 --> 00:20:21,663 Okay. 427 00:20:21,687 --> 00:20:23,086 Bless you. 428 00:20:25,724 --> 00:20:29,003 Oh, and listen, barney, Just sign them "Frankie," huh? 429 00:20:29,027 --> 00:20:31,328 And send me a couple of copies. 430 00:20:36,002 --> 00:20:38,480 Okay, you folks want to Sign a complaint right here, 431 00:20:38,504 --> 00:20:39,637 You can go home. 432 00:20:47,947 --> 00:20:49,391 Excuse me. 433 00:20:49,415 --> 00:20:54,162 Would it be possible to Speak to mr. Yeager privately? 434 00:20:54,186 --> 00:20:56,353 Don't get too near the cage. 435 00:20:58,524 --> 00:21:00,490 'cause he really hates you. 436 00:21:14,173 --> 00:21:17,786 Mr. Yeager... Get away from me! 437 00:21:17,810 --> 00:21:19,688 Mr. Yeager, please. 438 00:21:19,712 --> 00:21:22,825 We want to make things right. 439 00:21:22,849 --> 00:21:24,793 I got nothing to say to you! 440 00:21:24,817 --> 00:21:27,295 You could at least Listen to a person. 441 00:21:27,319 --> 00:21:31,333 We don't have $10,000, But we have managed 442 00:21:31,357 --> 00:21:33,468 To save a little Here, a little there. 443 00:21:33,492 --> 00:21:35,503 Forget it! Beat it! 444 00:21:35,527 --> 00:21:37,806 Please, mr. Yeager. 445 00:21:37,830 --> 00:21:42,344 We want you to take your Mother out of plattsburgh 446 00:21:42,368 --> 00:21:44,835 And put her in miami. 447 00:21:46,873 --> 00:21:50,152 At least for the winter. 448 00:21:50,176 --> 00:21:52,220 What, are you kidding me? 449 00:21:52,244 --> 00:21:54,923 I wish we could do more. 450 00:21:54,947 --> 00:21:57,948 You people know I Wanted to kill you? 451 00:21:59,285 --> 00:22:01,096 I robbed your shop. 452 00:22:01,120 --> 00:22:03,799 You were just upset, mr. Yeager. 453 00:22:03,823 --> 00:22:07,335 And I was rude on the phone. 454 00:22:07,359 --> 00:22:10,105 But never mind. It's settled. 455 00:22:10,129 --> 00:22:13,175 Ira, write the man a check. 456 00:22:13,199 --> 00:22:15,711 No, no, no! I can't Take your money! 457 00:22:15,735 --> 00:22:16,901 Why not? 458 00:22:19,071 --> 00:22:22,117 Because you people Just made a mistake. 459 00:22:22,141 --> 00:22:24,652 Anybody can make a mistake. 460 00:22:24,676 --> 00:22:27,790 And you're being so nice! 461 00:22:27,814 --> 00:22:30,959 And you can forget about Your cold cuts, you know? 462 00:22:30,983 --> 00:22:33,083 What I couldn't Eat I stepped on! 463 00:22:39,658 --> 00:22:42,237 Take the money. 464 00:22:42,261 --> 00:22:43,972 I can't. 465 00:22:43,996 --> 00:22:47,464 Gordon, you suffered enough. 466 00:22:49,101 --> 00:22:52,103 I could never live With myself, ira! 467 00:22:54,107 --> 00:22:57,207 It'll be easier than Living with miriam. 468 00:22:58,810 --> 00:23:01,312 Have some consideration, huh? 469 00:23:02,781 --> 00:23:04,348 Take the money. 470 00:23:07,787 --> 00:23:09,097 Okay. 471 00:23:09,121 --> 00:23:11,199 Okay. 472 00:23:11,223 --> 00:23:13,535 But only for mom. 473 00:23:13,559 --> 00:23:15,760 We appreciate it. 474 00:23:18,998 --> 00:23:21,966 Such a wonderful son. 475 00:23:23,970 --> 00:23:25,814 Captain? 476 00:23:25,838 --> 00:23:27,682 Uh, yeah. Come in, harris. 477 00:23:27,706 --> 00:23:29,718 I finished processing shapper. 478 00:23:29,742 --> 00:23:31,787 I'm gonna run him Over to the tombs, 479 00:23:31,811 --> 00:23:34,022 And then I'm gonna go On home from there. 480 00:23:34,046 --> 00:23:36,458 Hold it, uh... 481 00:23:36,482 --> 00:23:38,527 Why don't we get Wojo to do that? 482 00:23:38,551 --> 00:23:41,964 Maybe we can, uh... Talk? 483 00:23:44,523 --> 00:23:45,890 Good night. 484 00:23:48,627 --> 00:23:50,072 You guys kiss and make up? 485 00:23:50,096 --> 00:23:51,406 What do you want? 486 00:23:51,430 --> 00:23:54,176 The buckmans want to Drop charges against yeager. 487 00:23:54,200 --> 00:23:56,078 I take it they worked it out? 488 00:23:56,102 --> 00:23:57,746 Yeah, they bought him off. 489 00:23:57,770 --> 00:23:59,581 All right, let him go. 490 00:23:59,605 --> 00:24:01,984 It's after 6:00. Aren't You gonna check out? 491 00:24:02,008 --> 00:24:04,208 I think I'm gonna Be here for a while. 492 00:24:05,812 --> 00:24:07,155 Tired of liz? 493 00:24:07,179 --> 00:24:08,756 Good night, dietrich. 494 00:24:08,780 --> 00:24:10,758 Night. 495 00:24:10,782 --> 00:24:16,453 "Dear mai noi lo..." 496 00:24:19,625 --> 00:24:21,470 Compassion. 497 00:24:21,494 --> 00:24:23,193 I really needed it.